I’ve been told to tell this story. Not sure what you’ll get from this, but I’ll share it all the same.
On Dec 26th 2016, we delivered (rather I delivered) our baby girl at home.
The statement “At Home”, seemed to take a lot of people by surprise. I’ve been called brave many times, but to me it was convenient, lazy, less stressful and, ok, maybe a little bit of bravery was conjured up.
When I discovered I was pregnant, we had just decluttered our whole space and I had put our last baby item, a car seat, on the curb for anyone to pick up. I was, so I thought, closing the chapter on babies.
3 weeks later, the chapter was going to have to be reopened. First, I had to call family and let them know the news, only because the baby would be due in December and we had previously all been making travel & other plans. Those plans would now have to change.
Next, OBGYN’s were not my thing (no offense to all the doctors out there). My experience with them in the past had been mostly stressful as I was poked and prodded by random staff and got my head filled with all kinds of what if scenarios and fear based thoughts, while in the same breath telling me not to stress because it is bad for the baby. The best way not to stress was to avoid stressful news and stressful people.
The last time I used a midwifery service that practiced more like doctors. They stressed me out too, so I wasn’t going back.
To be fair, I had 2 kids already, and both were virginal births with no complications. So, I was most likely less in need of all the sophistications OBGYNs bring. I was not a fan of all the doctors’ visits where I drove far, searched far and wide for converted parking spots only to be told, “All is well, goodbye”. And then, the more pregnant and more difficult driving, walking and moving about was, the more they wanted you to come… Aghhhh.
That said, I decided to blissfully ignore what was going on and act like nothing was happening.
Medical Care, for real
In the 4th month, on the train back from work one day, I felt like I couldn’t breathe for a moment. I decided it was a good time to involve some professionals in this process.
I found a more low key midwifery service in our neighborhood. Great! Let’s talk?! At their informational, they had me at “Home visits!!!!” I never have to be embarrassingly late for a doctor’s appointment again!!(Cheers$%)). Some of the visits were community care sessions with other women having babies around the same time, cool.
The only hiccup to these midwives, “So, you are considering a home birth?”, “I am??”, “Yes, cause that is all we do.”, “Hmm…”
“What happens in an emergency?”, “We bring a lot of delivery room type gear with us. But if we need to, we send for an ambulance and take you to the hospital”. In my case, we live less than half a mile from 2 hospitals, which the midwives were very familiar with, and the ambulance service is just one street away. The real concern: if this was child number 1 or 2, a home birth would have been no problem, but I will have 2 curious needy kids around while I birthed??, “I’m not sure that would work..”
Then comes my sister, whose son was going to be turning 1. His birthday was the same as my due date. She said, “Hey, I want the boys here for xxx birthday. I know you can’t come but you have to send the boys over, we’ll handle them.” “Ok, can you hold on to them till I’m done with the birth?”, “Sure”.
Ok, so home birth it is :).
Next story: My Home Birth Story – The experience
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