For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction
Newton’s 3rd law of motion
If this statement is true, then it makes sense that for every forward movement, there would be somethings equally strong trying to hold you back. If you push on something heavy, you will always feel a push back.
I have definitely felt this push back ever since I decided to explore alternative incomes. I was content working 9-5 and earning a paycheck (somewhat). When an opportunity to earn money through an additional income stream showed up, I didn’t even want it. I just went for it because, well, I’m a Nigerian and I’m not supposed to shy away from making money, (nail bite smiley).
I feel this push back every time I have an idea that could potentially make me money. I felt this even when I was succeeding and before decisions to quit. I could perform the same activity for free, mind you, with no mental pangs at all. But, if I were to be paid, that uncomfortable push back feeling will surface.
In the past I used to listen to this voice, sometimes mistaking it for instincts, or a sign that I am NOT supposed to move forward with something.
I now understand that this is part of the journey to new heights. Self-doubt is a feeling I’m going to have to get used to. The very presence of self-doubt is an indication that I am moving in the direction of growth.
In doing a little reading on this, people are saying this is something I have to get over. The trick will be to move forward anyways! Move forward in spite of myself, in spite of the way I feel! I guess there are ways to get around even heavy objects.
So, how do we get over this inevitable feeling:
1. Forgive ourselves
Recognize that it ok to feel this way. We will feel this way sometimes and that is ok!
2. Change the focus
Anytime there is self-doubt, that means we are thinking about ourselves and our own abilities and not about the people we want to serve and their needs. Focus on service to them.
3. Minimize its significance
Gain & Loss, Success & Failure, are all one. They are all points on the road to achievement. The only thing we have to focus on is showing up and playing our part.
4. Remember God
Sometimes I think of my vision, and think, there is no way I can do all this or make all this happen by myself, which is true. Then I remember Tosha Silver ‘Without God’ game. “It’s impossible …without God”. She adds ‘without God’ to statements of self-doubt to remind herself that, WITH GOD all things are possible. The God that gave me and you the vision will send the right help and reveal the right path forward at the right time, Amen.
5. Recognize our value
Remind yourself of your accomplishments, the value you add and your natural abilities. Remind yourself of the many times the impossible has happened. One time, I was in-between jobs and was feeling low. People were calling me with low-ball offers. Eventually, I faced up to myself and started to reminded myself of the value I bring to the table. This boosted my spirits. Five minutes later, I started getting calls for offers significantly better, 50% or more, and never got low balled again.
6. Get inspired
Find positive thoughts that counter the feeling and boost your confidence.
These are a few Pinterest posters to get you past your stuck points:
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